Standing Above the Crowd: Former NBA All-Star James Donaldson On Mental Health, Purpose & Life After Success (Inspirational)

What if the strongest thing you could do today isn’t pushing harder—but finally admitting you need help to survive and thrive?

In this deeply inspirational and motivational podcast episode, Reginald D sits down with former NBA All-Star, author, and mental health advocate James Donaldson for a raw, honest, and powerful motivational speech–driven conversation about success, identity, mental health, and choosing life. James is also the founder of the Your Gift of Life Foundation.

 From unseen battles of depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts, this episode delivers an inspirational motivational message for anyone who looks strong on the outside but feels broken on the inside. This is a must-listen motivational speech podcast about resilience, purpose, and standing above the crowd when life tries to pull you under.

Many people appear successful, disciplined, and accomplished—yet silently struggle with loneliness, depression, identity loss, and emotional exhaustion. This inspirational and motivational speech-style podcast episode speaks directly to listeners navigating high-pressure careers, personal loss, mental health challenges, or the quiet pain of feeling alone despite outward success. Through lived experience and hard-earned wisdom, this episode helps you reframe strength, rediscover purpose, and understand that asking for help is not weakness—it’s a powerful act of motivation and self-preservation.

Press play now to experience this unforgettable inspirational and motivational speech conversation and walk away with renewed strength, clarity, and hope for your life.

James's contact info:

Your Gift of Life  Foundation - www.yourgiftoflife.org

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Transcript

 Welcome to Real Talk with Reginald D. I'm your host, Reginald D. On today's episode, I have James Donaldson. James is a former NBA All Star basketball player, author of Standing above the Crowd and Celebrating your Gift of Life, and the host of Standing above the Crowd with James Donaldson podcast. James is also the founder of the your Gift of Life foundation, focusing on mental health awareness. Welcome to the show, James. James Donaldson: Reginald. Hey man. Great to see you, man. I'm so happy to connect with you finally. Here we are. Reginald D: Yes, sir. James Donaldson: Yes, sir. Yes, sir. I've been waiting on him. Reginald D: I'm so glad we got together. So, James, before the NBA, before the spotlight, who was James Donaldson as a young man? Can you share a little bit about your childhood? James Donaldson: I sure will. You know, I was a Air Force brat. My dad was in the air force for 20 years and he was stationed here, my mom over in England and Great Britain for about four years. So I was actually born over in Great Britain, in England. Came back to the States as a toddler, a little two year old, to Vallejo, California, Travis Air Force Base, where he finished out his Air Force career. After that we moved over to Sacramento probably about when I was 6 or 8 years old. And I grew up in Sacramento, California. I thought I did pretty well in school. I was always interested in learning, so school came kind of naturally to me. Sports didn't come very naturally as a matter of fact, Ironically enough, it took me until my senior year in high school to start playing competitive sports, but that was kind of my trajectory and who I was as a kid. Reginald D: Okay, so now you've reached the highest level of professional basketball and became an NBA All Star. What did success give you and what did it quality take away from you? James Donaldson: Well, I'll go with what it takes away more than anything right now. What it takes away is, I mean, a lot of your free time. You've got to be extra dedicated and disciplined to achieve those kind of lofty heights of success in anything. Whatever you do, it's going to demand your time, it's going to demand your attention, it's going to change and alter your lifestyle somewhat and you have to be able to adapt to that. That I didn't feel like I could balance both the professional life and the personal life in a way where I could have this outstanding NBA career going and also have a marriage going at the same time. I knew one of them would suffer and I didn't want my NBA life to suffer. So I put that off until after I was retired before finally pursuing marriage. And so that's what it does take away. You have to sacrifice. And it's going to be difficult, it's going to be tough. But you know, with success comes rewards as well and all the trappings of that. So material things, financial things. If you really continue to pursue those goals and those dreams, you'll get there eventually. I enjoyed the life that I was living. I worked long and hard for it. People don't see the hard work that goes into successful people. And you know, they see the finished product a lot of times thinking that they just woke up and all of a sudden they were there. No, this is years in the making. But success also comes with a lot of responsibilities, a lot of obligations. But it really frees you to do so much of what you want to do with your life, which is what it did for me. Reginald D: Yeah, like you said, people take success, they look at the outside picture, don't really know what goes on on the inside, you know, especially with athletes and just people, period, you know, things like that, so. James Donaldson: That's right. Reginald D: You know, being an elite athlete, I know it comes with a lot and people always think you got it together. But did you have any internal struggles when you were playing all those years that people never saw? James Donaldson: I didn't really have any internal struggles. You know, I mean, the physical demand on you is the outside physical struggles that you're going through, you're gonna be injured, you're gonna have some surgeries, you're gonna have to rehabilitate and get back on your feet again. But they have doctors and trainers and team physicians for all of that to help you with that. After all, we are a commodity of sorts. And so they're investing heavily in us and they want to get us back up on our feet and back out there as quick as they can. So I didn't have the internal struggles that you mentioned, probably not until I had a very serious knee injury that knocked me out for about eight months. And there all of a sudden, I'm sitting at home all by myself, the phone's not ringing anymore, the so called friends aren't coming by anymore, the ticket requests dried up and I just said, wow, this is life. When you are no longer valuable in that regard to a lot of people that you thought you were more valuable to. I learned at that point that, hey, this is a real tough business. You have to take care of yourself and shape your world around you the way you want it to be. Because fans are going to be fickle, they're going to be fair weather, they're Going to come when the times are good. They're going to bend you when the times are bad. And a lot of young players going into this stuff don't understand that until they have to go through it. Reginald D: Yeah, most definitely. And one thing I want to talk about, because I think this works a lot in sports. People deal with it in sports and in their personal life. So when you walked away from basketball, you know, did you feel like some type of emptiness or anything like that? James Donaldson: Well, not really. I mean, a lot of guys do, but I had played a long, long time. I played 20 years professional basket, 14 years in the NBA and then six more years overseas in Europe. And at that point I was 42 years old. When I finally, finally retired. I had already established what I was going to do next. I had a physical therapy business I started up in 1989. It was fully up and running and matured by the time I retired. And I was able to just transition into that very seamlessly and easily because I had a great team I was working with of managers and operators who kept the business going. I'd be part of it when I could, especially during the off season, during the summers. But then eight months, nine months of the year, I'm off playing basketball. And I did that for the first 10, 12 years of the business. So I had to roll into this as much passion as basketball did. This is what I got up in the morning to do this great about. But you mentioned, you know, a lot of players, a lot of athletes especially, just don't have a backup plan. What happens if this doesn't pan out to be a 20 year career? You know, the average NBA career is only three years. The average NFL career is a year and a half. And so these are young men, when they're finished, and a lot of them have no idea what's next. Reginald D: Yeah, and that's kind of strong and terrible too, because I've actually seen people, not even athletes, like people have this long successful career on a job and they retire and then all of a sudden just falls apart, you know, because it seemed like they lost their identity or they lost something, you know, and then it started going downhill when you should be trying to live the best time of your life now that you retired and you've done it. You know, I seen a lot of people that didn't have, you know, something to back them up or in a hobby or whatever the case may be, and ended up going downhill and things like that. James Donaldson: That's right. Reginald D: So, James, for someone listening right now who looks Successful on the outside, but feels broken inside. What do you want them to know? James Donaldson: Well, you know, you can't judge a book by its cover, and I know we do. I mean, that's the old adage, you know, you can't judge a book by its cover, but we tend to. So you see that look successful. They look the part. They're dressing well, they're driving a nice car. Seems like they have money in the bank. Seems like they got a nice home. You know, they might be swallowed up in debt and trying to keep in front of the bill collectors. Going home to a real stressful environment, family life, the wife and kids or the husband and kids, you know, what are you going home to? And so I'd advise people to get to know the person behind all of that facade, that success facade that we all wear. You know, we learn to reject and put out there what we want people to see. But on the inside, as I say, a lot of times we tore up from the flow up, right? And we just don't know that unless we share that with somebody. And my encouragement, especially to men, is to share that with other people in your life who are close to you, who you care about, who love you. I know we're taught to be strong and silent and proud and do it alone, do it by myself. I can make it through. But men especially. Come on, man, you guys. We have to be able to reach out for help and ask for help and let people know we need help when that time does hit us in our life, because sure enough, it will. This is a lot of the work I do now. I mean, I went through some very difficult, challenging times of mental health, struggles of anxiety and depression and suicidal thoughts and ideations, and wanted to throw my whole life away, wanted to take my life. But I reached out for help, and I got help. And it took me a good 12 months to work through all of that, to get back on my feet again. But nobody would have known if I didn't say something. And that's my encouragement to all y' all out there. Say something. Find somebody in your life who's close to you that you can confide in, and they'll be there with you throughout. Reginald D: Yes, absolutely. And I'm glad you touched on the men, because that's one thing that I think we struggle with. So let me ask you this question, James. What are some of the lies that, as men, we have to unlearn about strength, masculinity, or just asking for help? James Donaldson: Well, you know, you look back through our childhood we grew up with little boys don't cry, right? So we carry that into adulthood. We don't cry, we don't tell people that we hurt. We don't tell people we need help. You know, we tend to go at it alone. Men are the most lonely population in this country. And so many of us, even though we might have friends around us, we might have a family at home, but we're still alone because we live in that little isolated world we build around us. We won't let people in, we won't reach out. And so we need to unlearn those kind of things. Look at me, I'm big old tall, strong guy, you know, I mean, the epitome of masculinity, I'm sure. But I cry, man. I mean, I've got deals up on YouTube and people see me crying, people see me talking about my mental health struggles day and night and night on end of just crying myself asleep on my pillow, you know, with nobody to talk to except for that person, that good friend who I can call at 2 in the morning and let them know I can't sleep, that I'm thinking about hurting myself. That takes a real man to do those kind of things. And men, we can do better, we can be better and we can get there. So we just have to work at it little by little. If you don't feel comfortable at this point. Reginald D: Yes, well said, well said. You talked about mental health issues. You know, that's the thing about it. If you don't reach out, man, there's a place in every man where he has to be vulnerable, sometimes has to be vulnerable. And when it comes to your life, you got to make sure you tap into that vulnerability. You know, if you're dealing with something that strong. James Donaldson: That's right. Reginald D: James, looking back, what do you wish someone had told you during your darkest seasons? James Donaldson: Wow, that's a good question. You know, I look back now and I probably what threw me into the the throes of darkness was an emergency open heart surgery that laid me flat on my back for the next year. This is back in 2015. I had a follow up surgery. 2016, for essentially two years, I was basically inactive. I couldn't run my business anymore. I'm trying to keep things going, but I'm on heavy medication with pain medications. I can't move, I can't take care of myself. And I wish I had known, you know, that good times won't last forever. You know, we're going to go through a tough time. And to be sure to reach out. I have sense enough to reach out to my doctor. First of all, okay, that's who diagnosed me with anxiety and depression, suicidal ideations, and then my friends. After that, I had a small group of four or five, six friends, all of them in my age group. All of them had known me for about 40 years. And I started talking to them and let them know, hey, man, I need you guys to check in on me because I'm here all by myself, and I need you to let me call you. Even if it's at 2 in the morning. They all put their hand up, say, hey, put me on speed down. You know, you can do it. We can do it. And we got through this together. You know, it wasn't just me. That's my thing to men out there. You can't do it by yourself. You got to put your little team around you to help you out, starting with your medical doctor and then a small group of intimate friends. You only need two or three of them, one or two even, who care about you and be able to lean on them and carry you through that dark time. Reginald D: Yes. Oh, yes, absolutely. So, James, you founded the Gift of Life foundation, and your pain became purpose through your foundation. How did the advocacy become part of your healing journey? James Donaldson: Well, you know, when that darkness finally started lifting in 2019, and I'm looking at myself, looking at my life, thinking I'd lost everything, lost my health, I'd lost my wealth, I'd lost my house, I lost my marriage, I lost my life savings, I went through a bankruptcy, I went through a foreclosure. I lost everything except for my life. And I was about ready to throw that away at my own hands. That darkness finally started lifting in 2019. And, you know, I'm arguing with God back and forth. You know, like I say, my arms are too short to box with God. You know, So I heard his voice, and he said, james, hey, I let you go through that because I wanted you to know about mental health challenges that people go through. You didn't know anything about it beforehand. Now, you know, I'm like, wow. He said, you got the platform. You a big, strong, tall, African American male, and your community needs you. Men need you. School children need you. They need to hear your story. They need to know how you worked your way through all of that to get back to a life of purpose and joy. And that's why I let you go through what you went through. And now I want you to get out there. That's what the impetus was to start My foundation in 2019, your gift of Life Foundation. Because I found that life is truly the most precious gift that we have. You know, we have money, we have houses, we got cars, we got spouses. But life is the most precious gift. And without that, you have nothing. And so that's why I named it your Gift of Life Foundation. And so what I do with that now is I go out and tell my story. I share my story. I talk to school children all over the state of Washington. I'm out here in Seattle, Washington, middle school and high school kids who at the end of an assembly of four or five hundred kids, there's always four or five that come up afterwards and tell me, hey, I'm suicidal right now. 10 year olds, 12 year olds, 14 year olds, suicidal right now. I'm like, whoa, you ain't even begin to live yet. And so that's the work I'm doing. And then also working with us men, especially men of color, you know, we got our cultural thing that says, hey, I ain't going to tell. Ain't nobody going to know my business. Right? Come on, guys, we can do so much better. Reginald D: Yeah, absolutely. And the thing about it, you know, it's amazing how powerful your purpose can be. You know, in your darkest moments, you started walking in your purpose and it helps you, brings you right up out of it. Because now you onto something different because of the power of your purpose. James Donaldson: So true, so true. So true. Wow. Reginald D: So, James, why is suicide prevention and mental health awareness especially important in sports? High pressure careers and among men? James Donaldson: Well, because those are high pressure careers. You know, physicians have one of the highest suicide rates in the country. Physicians, here they are, they've gone to all that schooling, medical school, eight years, 10 years, they're treating patients all day. They're hearing patients problems, but they have nobody to talk to themselves. Okay, you can talk to your colleague, maybe, maybe. But that's a verified error up there. Being a surgeon or a doctor, it's verified error. Being an athlete, who are you going to talk to in your neighborhood that understands what you might be going through other than one of your peers, one of your colleagues, which are few and far between at that level. And so we have to be able to reach out. You know, mental health challenge is one of those things on the outside. You can't tell anything wrong. I can't tell what you might be going through, Reginald. You can't tell what I might be going through right at this moment? After this podcast over, you got to go back to what you got to go Back to. And I got to go back to what I go, okay? So unless we let each other know that, hey, I need to talk to somebody, I think the world be better off without me. I need some help. That's how you get it. They won't go just intuitively looking at you that, hey, James looked like he might need some help. Let me go talk to him. No, no. I need to reach out to them and then be able to get that help in my life, get that circle of support around me and be able to put that all in place for me to be able to rise up together as a team. And so that's what I've learned, and that's what the work is that I do is to continue encouraging people. You are not alone. Millions of people think about taking their life. Millions of people attempt to take their life. 50,000 people a year take their life. And that's way too many. 50,000 too many. It doesn't have to be that way. So you're not alone just because you have that thought. You know, you're not even alone because you attempt it. But, hey, don't go that far. Okay? Stop it. Nip it in the bud, and you won't have to go down that dark, treacherous path that I went down. Reginald D: Yes. Yes. So, James, can you tell us about your book, standing above the crowd and celebrating your gift of life and what encourages you to write it? James Donaldson: Right. Well, my first book, and this is the ups and downs of life. Okay. My first book, Stand above the crowd, was all about motivational inspirational success strategies in life, sports, business. This was put out about a good 10, 10, 15 years ago. And there's a lot of commonalities and what makes a person successful from whatever you do in life, you know, discipline, hard work, sacrifice, perseverance. Keep on chasing your goal, your dream down, and you'll get there. That that's what's standing above the crowd. But the book that I really think will help people even more is celebrating your gift of life. Because that's my story. That's my. My whole episode and experience of what I went through. And also helpful exercises at the end of every chapter that are introspective, that causes you to think. And you can even write down in the book on the. I get several lines on each page that you can write in your book about. Wow. This is how I'm feeling. This is what's important to me. This is the daily prayer that I put out. Okay. And that book is really the book that I'm most proud of. Because this is something that everybody's going to go through at some point. You know, we're all going to lose a parent at some point. You know, this is just natural cycle of life. Our parents are 20, 30 years older. At some point, they're going to be 89 years old and they're going to pass away. Most of the time, we can prepare for that. None of us expect to lose a child, though. And with these fentanyl overdoses and opioid overdoses, hundreds of thousands of people are losing their children. Okay, that's devastating. To lose one child, two children, some people. And so we have to be able to put ourselves back together again and realize that life is not over. Because I suffered a tremendous blow along this journey. I need to get back on my feet again. And that's what celebrating your gift of life will teach you to do. Get back on your feet again, get your team around you realize, and regain another purpose in life. And that's what I did. My purpose now is to be an advocate and a voice for mental health awareness and suicide prevention every single day. Reginald D: That's awesome. So, James, you also have a podcast, Standing up on the Crowd with James Donald's podcast. Can you tell us a little bit about that? James Donaldson: Yes. Yeah. Thank you. And that's something that's relatively new of this year. We have about 25 episodes out now. Standing above the Crowd with James Donaldson. And so, again, standing above the crowd of, you know, mediocrity and confusion and dysfunction that a lot of people are mired up in. We can stand above all that, you know, and standing above a crowd is different than standing out from a crowd. You know, we can throw on like they did back in the day, a rainbow color Afro wig and be at the NFL game and dancing around, you know, with our team logo painted on it. We can stand out from the crowd, but what you want to do is stand above the crowd, above that drama and that trauma that's down there. It's always going to be there, but you got to stand above it so you can see clearly where you're going and where you want to get to in life. And so my podcast is all about, you know, bringing on successful people who've been there and done that. A lot of mental health professionals who come in and really help us with our mental health now, but also athletes, you know, writers, book authors, know a variety of different things that really help enhance our life to be the best that it can be. And so that's all about standing above the crowd. You'll find it up on YouTube especially. I have a YouTube channel with standing up to the crowd, James Donaldson. It's on Apple and Spotify and all these other podcast icons on your phone. So you can just search me up and pull it right in. So that's the best way to get a hold of all of that. Got it. Reginald D: So, James, let me ask you this. If your story reaches just one person standing on the edge today, what is the one message you will want them to hear directly from you? James Donaldson: That life is worth living. I know you don't feel it right now, but life is worth living. It's going to get better. It may not get dramatically better tomorrow, but you got to make it to tomorrow to get to the next day and the next day, and eventually things will get better. Once you give up, it's over. There's no reset button. I mean, you take your life, there's no coming back. There's no let me get a do over. No. This is the one life that you have. And if you throw it away, shame on you. You know, you don't have to throw it away. You don't need to. And I don't want you to look around you and realize that people love you, people care about you. You may not feel it right now, but they do. And you have to let them know what you're going through. And together, you all get through that together. Okay? But please don't take your life. No matter what you do, no matter how far you've fallen, how dark the darkness is, I was there. I know. I wanted to take my life. Almost did. But I'm so glad it didn't. Because today I'm out here being my advocate self, spreading the word, looking at nature, you know, experiencing another beautiful day. The blessings are all around me now, and I would have missed out on all of that if I took my life. Reginald D: Yes. Yes. Life is so valuable. It's so valuable. So, James, I have what I call quick fire questions. James Donaldson: Okay. Reginald D: All right, you ready? James Donaldson: I'm ready. Reginald D: Give me one word that best describes your life today. James Donaldson: Purposeful. Reginald D: What's a misconception people have about depression or suicide? James Donaldson: That they're the only ones going through it? Reginald D: What does real hope look like for someone who feels exhausted about life? James Donaldson: Wow, that's a good one. You have to search for it. It's not going to just magically appear on your door. Okay. But it's out there for everybody. You can find it. Reginald D: Yes. I like that. Because you have to search for it. You're right. You're Right. All right, now, what was one of your favorite NBA teams to play against? James Donaldson: To play against. Wow. The Showtime Lakers. Imagine Kareem running at me. Oh, yes. Reginald D: Yeah, yeah, them Lakers back in the 80s, man. James Donaldson: That's right. Reginald D: Yeah. So. So, James, who was the toughest player you ever had to guard? James Donaldson: Wow. You know, I divvied that up into two different categories. The most unstoppable, Kareem Abdul Jabbar. No matter how I tried to block that sky hook, it still went over my fingertips and settled into the net. Time and time I have nightmares about it. Still the most unstoppable now the most difficult, the most unstoppable force, Moses Malone. Moses was a monster. I mean, he wore me out and jack sick my out. When we played with the Seattle SuperSonics to a tune of 38 points and 32 rebounds one game, I'm like, whoa. He wore us both out. So Moses had to be the most. Most difficult to play against. Reginald D: Yeah, I would agree with that, just looking at them play on tv. Because I'll tell you what, by that. James Donaldson: Career and that Scott Hump, man, everybody tried. Everybody tried. They couldn't get it. Can't get it. Reginald D: So, James, what was your favorite pre game pump up music back in your playing days? James Donaldson: Wow. You know, I was. I was into all the, you know, the funk and the P Funk and Parliament and all the rest. You know, Dr. Frankenstein. I was into all that music and it just got me going, you know, boom, boom, boom. You know, the mothership connection. That's the 70s and 80s. But that really brought me into the 80s and. And throughout. As far as what really got me going, that kind of thumping music, rhythmic, great lyrics. I can still see it to this day, how it really moved me and got me going so much. Reginald D: Yeah, man, it'll do it today too. James Donaldson: You turn it on right now. Yeah, exactly, exactly. Reginald D: So lastly, James, how can my listeners follow you? James Donaldson: Well, you know, I got a pretty big social presence. You can follow me on my Facebook pages. I got four or five different pages out there. Just type my name in the search bar. I'm on LinkedIn. You can find me there. Search bar, Instagram, Twitter. Twitter has a couple different pages. Your gift of life is the one I'm most active on. You can find it at your gift of Life on Twitter. YouTube. My YouTube channel has a lot of the videos that I put out and a lot of the work that I'm doing. And also, you know, I have a daily blog called standing above the Crowd.com that you can Get a daily blog from me. Each and every day, I put out something, especially about mental health and about our young people, trying to help them out as best I can. So a variety of ways to follow me and keep up with what I'm doing. Reginald D: There you have it. James Donaldson. James, thank you so much, man. And I'm telling you, I'm really honored and I really, really respect. And I'm going to keep praying for the things you're doing for mental health, because it's serious, man. It's more serious than you ever known. You see stuff happening now. We didn't know nothing about this stuff growing up, man. We didn't hear about all this suicidal stuff with kids. It's a lot. James Donaldson: That's right. That's right. You know, the U.S. surgeon General came out about three or four years ago and said the number one mental health challenge we're having now is the loneliness. Loneliness. We are more connected than ever before, Reginald, of all this social media and these phones. In fact, we're more connected than ever. I got 5,000 friends on Facebook. I don't know a single one of them personally. Okay. But we are so disconnected in a way, too, and lonely. A lot of us are forgetting how to relate to each other, person to person, eye to eye. Sit down and put that phone away and talk to each other. And so I encourage people, find a good hour a day to just sit down and decompress, get away from that social media, talk to each other, sit on the couch, go out to a coffee, and just really start to reconnect with your fellow human beings out there. Because we all need each other more than ever before. Reginald D: Yes. James Donaldson: Yes. Reginald D: You're right. You're right. Because it is different now. I know I can walk into a room and see four people that know each other, and everybody's on the phone. James Donaldson: Doing something and nobody's talking to each other. That's right. That's right. That's right. The TV is going, so. Oh, man. Oh, man. It's incredible. But, hey, man, this has really been a pleasure. I really appreciate it. Reginald D: Yes, sir. James, thank you so much. Thank you so much. James Donaldson: All right, so send me over a copy of it when you're ready. And I'd be more than happy to put my social media as well. Reginald D: Okay, we'll do. Thank you for listening to Real Talk With Reginald D. If you enjoy listening to Real Talk with Reginald D, please rate and review on Apple Podcasts. See you next time.