From Trauma to Triumph: Claudine Iyabakiriho on Healing, Faith & Breaking Generational Cycles (Inspirational)

Are you still carrying silent pain from the past—and wondering if healing is even possible? 

In this unforgettable powerful inspirational episode, Reginald D sits down with Claudine Iyabakiriho—a faith-based speaker, trauma healing advocate, and women's empowerment leader from Rwanda who now calls Canada home. A survivor of genocide, childhood trauma, cultural displacement, and emotional abandonment, Claudine shares how she turned years of silent suffering into a powerful platform for healing and growth.

From enduring invisible wounds to breaking generational cycles and walking in divine purpose, Claudine reveals the moment she stopped surviving and started thriving. She talks about her powerful spiritual awakening, finding her voice through Les Brown’s speaker training, and launching her YouTube platform Trauma Healing and Growth with Claudine to help others find freedom, faith, and clarity.

If you’ve ever felt unseen, unworthy, or unsure of where to begin your healing journey, this episode will show you it’s never too late to rewrite your story and rise.

You'll Gain:

• Learn how to identify and begin healing invisible trauma that’s been passed down silently for generations.
• Discover the critical role faith and purpose play in moving from surviving to thriving.
• Be inspired by Claudine’s real-life journey from pain to platform—and gain the courage to start your own.

Tap play now to hear Claudine’s powerful story and discover how your healing journey can begin today with just one honest conversation—with yourself and with God.

Claudine's YouTube Channel: http://www.youtube.com/@ClaudineClauclau

trauma healing, faith-based speaker, generational healing, women's empowerment, Real Talk With Reginald D, emotional resilience, healing after trauma, Les Brown speaker, spiritual growth, immigrant story, personal transformation, YouTube healing, purpose-driven life, Claudine Iyabakiriho

Transcript

Reginald D: Welcome to Real Talk with Reginald D. I'm your host, Reginald D. On today's episode, I have Claudine. Colleen is a faith-based speaker, trauma healing advocate, and women's empowerment leader dedicated to helping others turn pain into purpose. Claudine also has a YouTube channel called Trauma Healing and Growth with Claudine. Welcome to the show, Claudine. Claudine: Thank you. Thank you for having me. Reginald D: Absolutely. Absolutely. So, Claudine, can you take us back to where your journey began, where you grew up and what your childhood was like? Claudine: Absolutely. Like you said, my name is Claudine Iyabakiriho. I was born and raised in Rwanda. And through my childhood, I grew up to see a country that was rebuilding itself after the genocide of 1994 and witnessing that as a child. I ran at early age about resilience, about community and hiding pain in my family. I was the firstborn of my family and I grew up being responsible for my siblings. We were four children. So I become responsible at very young age for my siblings, for my own mother, and later on for my own daughter. And that's who I am. I moved in Canada 2007 and I am a mother. I am a counselor and a licensed financial professional. Reginald D: Okay, so what was the pivotal moment or experience in your early life that shifted your perspective on purpose and identity? Claudine: Right. So my pirate moment was when I moved to Canada. Of course, it was at after years, four years of job race, after I finished my high school, I had no direction of life. So when I landed a scholarship to come to Canada, definitely that was the p moment for my life. I had dreams, I had goals to accomplish, and that was the gate to get to those goals. But as soon as I landed to the Canada soil, I quickly realized that it was not that easy to achieve those goals, to reach those dreams. I worked really hard. I worked multiple jobs, but I felt like I was not going anywhere. I struggled for the last 15 years, working multiple jobs and not seeing any progress. I saw myself still struggling and wondering how I can make it work. I felt unseen, I felt unstuck. But the moment of change for me came in my 40s when I experienced the breakup. And that breakup was, it cracked me open, it cracked my heart open. And it was the moment whereby I started thinking about my entire life and starting wondering why I was living that life. Why was I living a life that was not the life I was dreaming of when I come to Canada? So I really sat with myself and turned 316 inward degree and talk and thought about myself and how I could Change my life. And that's why I had a really talk with my God and ask God what he wanted me to do, what was my purpose, who I was, why, why? Despite working really hard, having dreams and goals, I was still nowhere to get to those goals. So I had to sit down with him and have those conversations and ask about who I was and what he wanted me to do in this life and how I could heal my pain and trauma and stop trauma leading my life and start living trauma free life. So that was my private moment. Reginald D: So let's talk about that. And that's very important that people got to understand you. Sometimes you have to focus on yourself and talk with God and see what it is he has for your life in the direction he wants you to go. So you talking about trauma in your life. What type of trauma did you have in your life? Claudine: Experienced all time of trauma. Like I said, I grew up in a country that suffered from genocide. I had those childhood trauma world traumatic experience. And then when I moved to a new country as well, I came with a luggage. And then moving to a new country as well, I came with another luggage to understand and live in a new culture where I knew nobody. English was this small. So I had to learn to speak English and go to university and catch up really quick. I had to learn to live in a Canadian culture. Everything was new. So. And that brought a lot of traumas, the existing one. And it kept adding up and they kept living in that traumatized experience until the moment I had to sit down and ask myself those questions. I was like, why do I still live in this trauma? It needs to go if I need to get where I want to go. And it couldn't happen unless I sat down with myself and understand the origin of my struggles. Why did I have to beg to be love? For example, why did I felt like I had to force myself to have just the basic need, the job? Why did I have to struggle in every single of the ways? There was a reason for that. And that's why I sat down with myself and understand the root of those struggles. And the more I sat down and dig deeper, I realized that it was all coming from trauma, unhealing trauma I was dealing with all the time. Reginald D: So Claudian, you're not just a survivor, you're. You're a warrior and an advocate. What led you to turn your pain and your trauma into a platform? Claudine: That's a great question. Honestly, I got tired. I got tired of suffering in silence and pretending that it was okay. Realized that if I wanted to change my life. That has to start with me making a decision to sit down and listen to my pen and try to understand what he's trying to teach me. Instead of staying in that victimized mindset, sit down with that pain and feel it and just stay there and be observant and understand what was trying to teach me. So the moment I made that decision, everything around me and in me started changing. And the wrong way as I go. I remember quitting a job I was having for over the last 10 years. And that job was in a very toxic environment. I was scared to leave before, but when I realized that I'm growing that environment, I knew that I needed to go. It was a very scary step to take, but it was necessary for my growth. So I left without having any clear picture of what's going to happen next. But I was determined to change my life. And as I walked through, as I was waiting, God was also beside me. He was providing me with what I needed to clear that part. I left that job, but he provided me with another one within a short period of time. And this time it was a job of my dream. Like a job I had been looking for years and years, but it kept being out of reach. But this time around, because I was ready, I was determined, and I was not desperate, but I was in my right path. It worked well. When I went to that interview, I was not as scared and nervous as I used to be. I was prepared and ready to go to the point. And I got that job on the sport. It was actually a temporary position, but I end up with a permanent position that I buy now as a counselor. And so that was one of the signs showing me that I was in the right path. And then I got another job offer. Opportunities started coming along the way. That job offer came from my financial bank, but it came right after I got the dream job I was looking for. And I was also already in the environment where I was learning about financial literacy. And being in that environment with people who were talking about generation wealth instead of generation trauma, I felt like I was in the right place, where I made it a mission to stay in that environment and stay around those smart people and learn from them. And until I become like them, where they were just teaching me things like how I can reach my goals, how I can grow as a person and being with them. The more I got involved with them, the more comfortable I become with public speaking, with doing the presentations. I had no financial background prior, but by being in that environment and learning from them. I was really hungry to know about everything and everything about money. And being in that environment taught me so much of how I can connect back to myself and and be able to find what was in me that can help me to move forward in my healing journey and everything else that comes with it. And through the same around that time, that's when also I had an idea to open a YouTube channel where I could share with the audience about my journey. Because I was seeing so much progress and positive progress that was coming along with the decision I made to change my life with this decision I made to sit down with myself and evaluate my entire life and start seeing it differently than how I used to see it before. So that's how I transformed my pain into platform and started sharing my story. Reginald D: That is very awesome. So, Claudia, what would you say to someone that has invisible wounds that people often overlook when it comes to the trauma? Claudine: Actually, you know, sometimes we think about trauma as something that only happens to us, something that happens to you. But it's also about something that we never have, something we never had the chance to have in our lives. Things like validation, for example, safety or maybe nurturing environment where you feel safe and loved and nurtured. Most of us, we don't have those kind of opportunities when we grow up. And by the time we are at that physically, but emotionally, mentally, spiritually, we are still like lost children who don't know how to live in this world. So many people carry a lot of wounds in themselves. And those wounds, they transfer from generation to generation. We see them in cultural to cultural. It doesn't matter if you're black, white or anything. It's all universal how we deal with our feelings, emotions and behavior. So those invisible wound, if we don't take time to actually sit with them and understand where they come from, the root cause of those, they transfer into scars that shapes our entire lives. And we live a life that is not aligned of what we've had the through life we didn't want to leave because we are living it in inherited space that takes space of everything else we want to achieve in life. So yeah, trauma is. It's a complex thing. Reginald D: Yes, it is. You have to. Claudine: Yeah. Reginald D: Have to really know how to deal with it and work the process when it comes to being traumatized about things like that in life. Claudine: Right. Reginald D: So here's the thing. When did you realize that your story could become someone else's survival guide? Claudine: When I realized that my story could be someone else's survival guide when I started witnessing My own progress in my own healing journey and seeing where I have come, where I am and where I'm going. When I started seeing clarity in my own journey and then I started remembering where I was coming from, how I used to be, how I used to see myself in every negative way. Instead of seeing myself as a beautiful creature that is here to be loved, nurtured, who has right to live a beautiful life. So when I started seeing my progress from where I I have come and where I am, both in my inner inside and in my environment, everything was changing to the positive. So I decided to make it a mission to help anyone else who is on the same journey or who might be contemplating even to start the journey, but they're afraid or they feel like it's not their, or they feel like they have nowhere to begin. Because the way I see myself, if I could make it happen for myself, somebody who used to be so anxious, so scared of everything, anything and now I'm sitting here talking to you, really this is a big deal. It's something I could never do five, 10 years ago because I will always self talk myself out of even opportunities because I will be busy thinking how the world will be seeing me or how people be criticizing me, for example, or anything negative. But see my progress of just getting out of that comfort zone, dealing with my issues and then being able to be aligned well in my professional life, everything going together. It's because I took that decision to say, you know, enough is enough. Trauma has said enough in my 40s, years of living. Now I have a chance to change that story. And I did. And I saw that change. I lived that change. That gave me the courage to put aside fear and to put aside anything else that I was making excuse of not to move ahead and say, you know, if I can do this, I know there is millions other people out there who, who need that light, who need that somebody who can tell them, hey, it's hard, but you can do it if you really want to, who can tell them, hey, just take one step at a time. You can do it. And that's how I said, okay, I'm ready to share my story for whoever is willing to listen. And if it helps somebody, then I have done my job. Reginald D: Exactly, exactly. I really like that. I really like that. Let me back up on something real quick. You talked about breaking generational cycles and generational curses. What does that. Because that's very important, I believe. Very, very, very important. Because like you see, one generation is doing the same thing. The last generation did. And nothing ever changes. And they're in this vicious cycle. So what does breaking a generational cycle look like in action? Claudine: It's like a war zone, if I'm being honest. It's very brutal. It means that you make decision to refuse to pass down what brought you. You refuse to pass down the pain, the trauma, the struggle to your next generation to come. It's that opportunity, that decision you make for yourself and say, the trauma that I have been carrying all this time, it's ending with me. I'm not passing it to my daughter and the next generation to come. It's that time I sit down with my family and have those tough conversations that we never had before and be real about those conversations and be able to tell them like, it's okay to say no. It's okay to say that I'm responsible for myself and it's okay for me to say no. To keep inabrating you. If you're doing something that is not helping you, it's just to be honest with yourself and with your surrounding and make sure that you are taking care of yourself first. That your environment, your family see you choosing therapy instead of silence, that you choose to speak about your struggles instead of avoiding them. And it's every day, everyday journey. It's something that lasts a lifetime. It's not an overnight conversation. You're done. So it's tough, but it's possible. Reginald D: Yes, exactly. Anything about it? You said, you know, being able to have your own voice. I always say if you don't have a voice, you don't have a life. Claudine: That's right. Yeah. Reginald D: All said and done. So Claudia, for someone just starting their healing journey, what's the first step they can take today? Claudine: One thing I would say is just being true for yourself. Face your truth, no matter how hard it is. That's your first point. If you want to really get down to the root of cause of your troubles, you need to be honest with yourself and have those tough conversations with yourself. Have that time where you sit down and understand the root cause of your troubles, of your traumas, of why you're living a life that you don't see yourself living, but you're living it. It's that step to go to a counselor, to go to a therapist, to go to support group, whatever it is that is going to help you to get out of that obscurity. It start with yourself? Pretty much, yes. Reginald D: So how has your relationship with God or your personal faith shaped your mission and your decisions in life to got you where you are today. Claudine: That's a very important question. My faith was everything in my journey. Doing it by myself or anybody who, I don't know, maybe you might be a believer or not, but you might also be believing in something higher than yourself. So I have tried 40 years of my life trying to do it by myself. It never worked until I sat down with my God, one to one, and have those conversations and ask, why am I here? What's my purpose? What do you want me to do to this earth? Why am I suffering? Why this? Why that? How can I change my life? And whenever I had those conversations with God, it worked. Sometimes I could not see the clear part, but if I sit down and listen, if he says, do this, you do that. And he will say, avoid this. Adjust as necessary as you go. And they do. It always worked out. So faith has been always, always important in my journey and still is. And I believe it's a vital tool when you're working on yourself, involving your spirituality as well, so that you can do it in proper way, holistically. Reginald D: And one thing I realized about you is that you went from surviving to thriving. And I think that's important in people's lives because when everybody's just trying to survive every day, survive every day, it's the biggest struggle it is and the biggest roadblock for you to get to your purpose. So you had to get to the point where you're thriving. So what helped you move from just surviving to now you're thriving and walking in your purpose and what God has for you? Claudine: For me, it was the time I decided to put surviving to rest. When I give myself permission to just be me, when I give myself permission to rest, to ask questions, really questions with myself and God and try to find those answers. When I stopped seeing Survivor as noble and seeing it as an obstacle that I can get away from if I want, right? Just giving myself that permission to know that I deserve better, to know that I'm beautifully and wonderfully made, I'm created with God's image, and that I have right to live a life that I deserve. I give myself that permission to stop seeing myself and struggles and feel like it's how it's supposed to be for me. I knew there was something more for me and that to get on that more, I needed to get out of that surviving mode. And how was I supposed to get out of that surviving mode is by sitting down with myself and just scan myself through and take out everything that was making me feel stuck for life. And that's exactly what I did. Reginald D: And you said something, Claudine, that you give yourself permission to be basically who you want to be in life. Claudine: Right. Reginald D: Nobody can give you permission to do this or do that. You have to give yourself permission and have the willpower to overcome any obstacles to get where you want to be in life. Claudine: Exactly. That's something we tend to forget that we were given that way when we were born. But as we grow up in a world that changes to however it want, we become shadows of ourselves. And we forget that we have that within ourselves to live the life that we want. If we go back to our root actually and find ourselves or through self or identity in our purpose. Reginald D: Absolutely. So, Claudia, what would you say to a woman who feels invisible, unworthy, or just say, it's too late for me to start living the life that they're supposed to live or walk into my purpose. Claudine: Right. I'll say that it's never too late to start to work on yourself. Because you matter. And there is no better way to start by telling yourself the truth. Actually that truth. You run away from that truth. You don't want to sit down and listen to it. To sit down and listen to your pain. What is trying to teach you rather than to avoid it. To let it speak to you loudly and hear what is trying to tell you. Because healing begins when you stop hiding from your story, from yourself first. When you start facing yourself like you are and accept yourself, your flaws, your weaknesses, your strength, your past, your present, then you can work on your future with everything you got. Once you have taken that down, then find the right environment for people. Because not everybody is happy or not everybody's supportive. When you start working on yourself. And that can be a barrier as well. If you start to change yourself by you stay in the same environment that is asking you to stay who you are. It does not work. So finding those supportive group cancer therapists, changing your work if you have to, just finding the right environment that support your work, that's the next step. Because truthfully, we all have choices. And depending on choices we make, that's how our lives become the life, become what we make it of it. You can start one thing at a time. You don't have to do everything at once. Healing is not overnight step. It's a lifetime journey. You can start by setting a boundary. If you have to, you can say no. No is a complete sentence. You can start investing in your dreams, in your goals, just small steps. The power return in small daily choices and small steps. They are small, but they're the one that gets you to the finish line. Pretty much, yes. Reginald D: Because I always say life is the journey, you know, you can't do it all in one day, you know. So, Claudine, can you finish the sentence for me? Claudine: Okay. Reginald D: I am most proud of the woman I become because. Claudine: Because of everything, because of the progress I see in myself, because of the parents I'm becoming from my daughter. Because of sitting down here and talking to you right now. I'm proud of that woman I've become, be able to sit down and share my story and tell the world that it is possible. If you want to change your life, it all start within you. Reginald D: Yes. I like that. I like it. So you just recently worked with motivational speaker Les Brown. Claudine: Right. Reginald D: Can you tell us a little bit about that experience? Claudine: Yeah, definitely. So just like when I started, I told you how I become a licensed financial professional. And when I started that journey, I faced a lot of barriers and public speaking was one of them. I really hated to talk in front of the crowd, and that's one of the main character you have to do if you want to be a strong financial professional. So whenever a child I was in front of people and presenting, I was like, oh my God, I'm shaking inside myself. But the more I kept pushing myself and talk and the more comfortable I became. And then that's why I had an idea to take probably a public speaking course so that I can still practicing my public speaking skills. And that's how I got into Ray Brown course. And it changed my life pretty much being part of that platform also. That's where I got that idea to open my YouTube channel and start sharing my story on YouTube channel. So, yeah, pretty much it was a life changing moment to be part of Race Brown program and part of it. That's why I'm here talking to you right now. And it's part of part of it. That's why I opened my YouTube channel and start talking to the whole world in front of cameras. If you knew how scared of cameras I was before Regina. So being part of that program really helped me to work on those fears slowly, progressively. Yeah, that's pretty much it. Reginald D: That's great because you're strong now. Claudine: Yeah, I feel that way too. Reginald D: Yeah, you're strong. Claudia, how can my artists stay connected with you, support your work or learn from you? Claudine: Just by watching my YouTube channel, I share a lot of my personal journey of whatever I went through. I feel like most of my personal experiences, it's quite relatable to Most people, it's just life journey. I talk about my divorce, I talk about my separation, my journey to Canada, how I dealt with my new identity and my new culture. Everything. I talk about immigration, I talk about finances. It's everything that is relatable and universal to each one of us. So if they can just watch what I post and comment and talk and open that healing space for everybody where everybody who is safe and welcome to learn and thrive together, that'll be awesome. Reginald D: Absolutely. I really feel they'll be blessed by it too, also. Claudine: Yes. Reginald D: So, last decline. What's the one message you want every listener to carry with them after hearing your story? Claudine: One message is that you matter. Your life has a purpose. And you can live a life you want if you make it. If you work on yourself, if you give yourself a chance to see the really you, you can live a happy life. Reginald D: I love it. So there you have it, everybody. Claudia, I thank you so much for taking your time out to hang out with me and come on the show with me today. It's definitely been a pleasure. Claudine: Thank you. Thank you so much. Reginald D: And I definitely will be praying for you in greater work for you. You know, your strength is there, you're pushing on and. And you want to keep doing great things. And I really appreciate people like you in this world. Claudine: Thank you. I appreciate you as well. Reginald D: Absolutely. Claudine: Having me. Reginald D: Absolutely. Thanks for tuning in. Real Talk with Reginald D. If you enjoyed listening to Real Talk with Reginald D, please rate and review on Apple Podcasts. See you next time.